[Zemo is quiet in response to that, brows knitting together thoughtfully. One of his hands flattens against Bucky's back lightly. This isn't... how he ever envisioned things ending up.
Bucky wasn't supposed to care about him, nor want him to be near. He wasn't supposed to miss him when he wasn't It was supposed to be sex, that's all. Release for both of them, in ways that they both chose and enjoyed, in ways they needed.
But it's beyond that now and there's no sense in lying to himself about it. He isn't certain how to feel about being missed when he's inevitably gone. Not by Bucky, at least.]
After I lost-- everyone, I felt as if I was a dead man walking. I had no future beyond what promises I made over the graves of my family. I was simply living to honor those, even up to the point you came to me in Berlin. I thought that I could finish my work, find rest...
[Although they both know how that ended up, don't they? No need to rehash that. Although admitting what he's about to-- isn't easy. It won't uncomplicate matters... and yet, Bucky was honest with him. It seems only fair he attempts to do the same.
Even if he thinks for a moment he should save them both the trouble.]
And then you came into my life again and gave me something that feels like life again. All of that to say, whenever this is over, it will feel like losing everything once again. Believe me when I say that I would rather not leave you at all.
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Bucky wasn't supposed to care about him, nor want him to be near. He wasn't supposed to miss him when he wasn't It was supposed to be sex, that's all. Release for both of them, in ways that they both chose and enjoyed, in ways they needed.
But it's beyond that now and there's no sense in lying to himself about it. He isn't certain how to feel about being missed when he's inevitably gone. Not by Bucky, at least.]
After I lost-- everyone, I felt as if I was a dead man walking. I had no future beyond what promises I made over the graves of my family. I was simply living to honor those, even up to the point you came to me in Berlin. I thought that I could finish my work, find rest...
[Although they both know how that ended up, don't they? No need to rehash that. Although admitting what he's about to-- isn't easy. It won't uncomplicate matters... and yet, Bucky was honest with him. It seems only fair he attempts to do the same.
Even if he thinks for a moment he should save them both the trouble.]
And then you came into my life again and gave me something that feels like life again. All of that to say, whenever this is over, it will feel like losing everything once again. Believe me when I say that I would rather not leave you at all.