experienceandpatience

No, I'm fine --

[ The scene is over, and Bucky will just deal with his traumas later. The fact he survived the fall at all likely has more to do with the prototype enhancements that Zola had been shooting him up with in Azzano than any intrinsic goodness or capability. He does find it endearing that Zemo's trying to comfort him in his own way, though. ]

I got this nifty new one anyways.

It is rather well-made. Lovely, even.

[Fingers slide from his hair to knead at the back of his neck soothingly. He leans up to brush lips against the side of his face. He may not be able to ease the horrors Bucky has endured, but hopefully a small distraction from his thoughts will be enough.]

[ Bucky's eyes slip half-shut, his attention only partially on the last bits of the movie. The smallest hints of a frown tug at the corners of his mouth when Luke is rescued; being able to psychically call for help could have saved his life when lying at the bottom of a snowy ravine.

But that's past. The movie ends, credits roll, and he starts to shift to move their snacks aside. ]

Kind of a bummer ending but I guess they wrap that up in the next one.

Most were disappointed by this movie when it was in the theatres. The heroes lost, the empire won.

[He watches as Bucky moves the snacks to the side, giving a softer smile.]

Perhaps one day, we can watch that one together.

[If he's allowed out again, of course. Not that he says that as he lifts his hand to cup the side of Bucky's face carefully.]

I should leave soon, but the issue is... I'd rather not.

[But he's also practical enough to recognize the immaturity of that statement. The childishness. He'll have to leave soon.]

[ Bucky turns into that touch, a wan smile tugging at his features. ]

I don't want you to leave either. But I told John you came over to work on mission plans, and I don't think he'd buy that again.

[ they're both tactical experts, so it's remarkably implausible to take more than a day (and even that is pushing it). But it would also feel a little like rushing if they fucked again before Zemo had to split. Bucky frowns, conflicted. ]

I can think of a couple ideas, but you probably wouldn't like them.

Oh, he certainly won't.

[And Zemo barely tolerates him as it is -- he's especially obnoxious when he feels he has reason to be angry.

He brings up his hand to push through the other man's hair.]

Try me, James.

[ Bucky sighs, hesitating for a very long moment, a grimace on his face. But Zemo's plying him with touch, and that's just cheating.

Bucky swallows, trying to pick his words carefully. ]

I was going to make it sound like you needed someone keeping an eye on you...because you've mentioned a couple times before --

That your life had nothing left after your family died.

[ god, Zemo, don't make him say it. Please. ]

[That has him arching a brow -- perhaps slightly surprised. He can't quite decide if he's surprised that Bucky has truly listened and paid heed to those remarks or that Bucky devise a plan like that.

He tilts his head, meeting Bucky's eyes as he considers those words.]

Do you truly want my company so much, James?

[It's not accusatory or angry. It's a genuine question.]

Look, I didn't say it was a good idea, just that you probably wouldn't like it--

[ He's already trying to backtrack, feeling as though he's insulted Zemo somehow. Yeah, he listened, of course he did. And he feels shitty because HYDRA taught him way too well to use other people's weak spots, and...

Bucky, flustered, shrugs. ]

It's fine, I'll think of something else.

James--

[He's-- not certain how he feels, actually. He should possibly be insulted -- that Bucky would mention that at all, let alone imply he'd use it. On the other hand, he hasn't tried to make that much of a secret of it either and can't quite say the sentiment isn't still the same.

But more importantly, he thinks it's rather telling how much Bucky wants him around that he'd even think back on that.]

I'm not angry. But you didn't answer my question.

[He tilts his head curiously as his hand reaches for Bucky's, holding it loosely.]

... Are you lonely?

No...?

[ But he answered too quickly, and definitely doesn't sound sure of himself. Considering what he mumbled last night (early this morning) about everyone always leaving him-- the cat is out of the proverbial bag.

He's lonely, desperately needs company, and is woefully under-socialized. It's part of why he did so well with Sam in New Orleans; between him and the boys and Sarah...it was good for Bucky.

Maybe there's something wrong with him, that the person he's trying most desperately to hold on to has killed innocent people and dignitaries.

Maybe it's what he deserves, being HYDRA's assassin boy for sixty years. ]

[That answer gets a bit more of an annoyed look, briefly at least. The dishonesty is bothersome, especially when it's so poorly done.]

At least lie better, James.

[If Bucky had voiced any of that -- well, Zemo wouldn't be sure what to feel about Bucky feeling all he deserves is a terrorist, but he's not particularly under any grand illusions about himself. Doing dirty, messy things is not something he's shied away from. He's a monster in the end, even if he was seeking necessary ends to prevent others from suffering like so many others have at the hands of super soldiers and HYDRA and people in costumes.

And apparently this is what Bucky wants with him. There's a short sigh that passes his lips as he brings up a hand to rest against the other's face, thumb brushing over his skin.]

If we can't come up with another way that I can stay, then I suppose... that is as good as any.

[Not that he's horribly comfortable with the idea of using something that is constantly at the back of his mind as an excuse, but he's just as uncomfortable leaving Bucky in this state.

Perhaps part of him just as selfishly doesn't want to leave.]

[ His face heats up, caught out by the lie. But he's not entirely comfortable voicing some of his feelings yet-- too vulnerable, too risky. Zemo's far more open but isn't he a man of modernity? Talking about one's inner life isn't something guys really did in the 40s.

But just trying to keep the roiling emotions at bay makes them more volatile, and his chest begins to tighten, his eyes pricking with the threat of tears. Chastened, Bucky looks downwards, his voice a soft murmur. ]

It was the first thing that popped in my head. Guess I can't stop being a spy even when I try.

[ But that's not what Zemo's bothered about. Bucky swallows again, finding it difficult to make direct eye contact. ]

I don't wanna be alone all the time.

[He isn't surprised that Bucky doesn't want to talk about what may be spinning around in his head, really. There are likely many reasons for that - the era he grew up in, what HYDRA did and the horrors probably still lurking in that head of his, that he's sure Bucky would rather not think about at all.

But it's easy to see the flush to his cheeks, the way his eyes seem to almost want to tear up.

For a moment, Zemo feels frozen for his own reasons. Conflicting urges to soothe James' worries, to give him what he needs, and that creeping little voice that says he's being foolish giving himself-- something to lose again. And he will lose it, one way or another.

He's not sure where he would be then. He knows where he was after his family.]

I know, James. [He ignores the sting in his own eyes, looking away briefly as he tries to settle his rushing thoughts.]

This is a rather complicated mess we've found ourselves in. [He breathes out something that may be a laugh, although it hardly sounds happy at the moment.]

Tell them what you need to tell them, James. [Because short of suicide watch, he can't come up with very many other plausible reasons to stay with Bucky... and even this one, Valentina will likely see through. She may tolerate it though.]

For the record, I don't look forward to the day I will lose you the same as everyone else I've held as dear to me. But for now, perhaps I can stay for a time.

[He pauses, looking around, and in an attempt to perhaps add something lighter into their conversation--]

I hope you don't mind if I add some personal comforts if I'm allowed to stay.

[ Bucky releases a breath of laughter, thankful for the levity. He slumps against Zemo, an odd sense of kinship that they're clearly in the same boat. ]

Are you kidding? I'm only keeping a rich baron around for his decor.

[ joking, of course. But he does steel himself before getting up to retrieve his phone.

Overheard: ]

Yeah, it's m-- no, nothing happened. Calm down. We're fine. Zemo's staying here.

...Because I want him to.

No.

No, it's n--

Listen, I know you'll sleep better knowing he's not just freewheeling around solo timing check-ins. If there's anyone who knows how to stay under the radar, it's me, so you won't have to worry about your super-secret team being found out.

...

Yeah, I'm here.

I heard you. I'll tell you if something goes wrong. But it won't.

[ another pause before he returns, dropping the phone onto the coffee table next to their empty popcorn bowl. He didn't lie, and didn't have to expose Zemo in order to have his way. Bucky collapses onto the sofa, suddenly tired again. He scrubs at his eyes, debating a nap-- at lunchtime. ]

There. All done.

[He hadn't thought when he came over the previous night that he'd be making any sort of arrangement to stay for a longer period of time. He-- trusts James though, and if he has to be under house arrest, he'd rather it be with someone he trusts.

He listens patiently to Bucky's conversation, a muscle in his jaw tightening.]

So the Countess was agreeable, I see... [Or the one-sided conversation certainly seemed to go in his favor, even if Zemo wonders if... this was the correct move for James or not.

Getting attached to a terrorist who already sealed his own fate is probably not the healthiest way to go.

And yet, he still reaches out to slide an arm around Bucky, encouraging him to lean in against him if he wants.]

[ Bucky leans in, not even thinking about how natural it feels. ]

She's not happy, but I think she's smart enough to be practical and she knows how to choose her battles.

[ it's just not worth fighting the once-Winter Soldier over someone she'd need to expend more resources on solo. Plus, even though she knows there's something between them, it plays to her advantage. Bucky leaves out her prissy little "warning" about how this is going to end up. Zemo likely already has a pretty good idea. ]

[Oh, he can certainly imagine what warnings Bucky received. He brings up a hand when Bucky leans in to comb through his hair -- though whether it's to soothe Bucky or himself more, it's difficult to say.]

Well, I suppose I should contact Oeznik. I do doubt you'll appreciate if I take all of your clothes after all.

[And with any luck, Bucky won't regret this decision of his in a few days' time.]

They probably won't fit. [ And now he's going a bit loose, eased by the fingers in his hair. ] You can always sleep at the other place if you get sick of me too. This isn't like house arrest or anything.

Say, Oeznik doesn't think of me like other supersoldiers does he?

Already relaxed enough to poke fun of my height, are you? [Not that Zemo has ever seemed overly bothered by the difference.] I suppose we will see. Who knows, perhaps one day, you'll rather me sleep elsewhere.

[Although Zemo has no intentions of being that poor of a houseguest really. He gives a wry smile.]

Oeznik is one of my dearest, oldest friends. I've known him since I was young. He trusts my judgement on these matters. [He pauses, considering it, before--] He wouldn't hurt you. He may even be a bit fond of you in his own way.

[ More like his body mass- Zemo isn't sporting big-ass supersoldier muscles like Bucky.

He tips his head back at the comments about Oeznik being fond. ]

What? Really? I thought he'd have rather that truck blew up with me in it, from the way he looks at me.

[ Maybe the old man is hard to read. ]

[ Alas, he doesn't quite have the muscle mass either. But that also doesn't mean he won't be stealing some shirts on occasion anyway. ]

He thought both you and Sam were too soft on them, too afraid to do what needed to be done because you needed to believe that there was some... hope of salvation. That they weren't dangerous symbols to be left alive, especially after the death of their leader.

[ and Bucky likely knows Zemo agrees with that as well. ]

[ He's heard this spiel before. ]

I'm sure.

So... the last part of the trilogy? I can make more popcorn or order some pizza.

[He suppresses a sigh at that. Well-- they are dealt with now, he supposes. No need to keep rehashing it... until the next would-be mad icon makes an appearance at the very least.]

Pizza, I think.

[Although there's a hint of amusement in his expression when he fixes his attention back on Bucky.]

A former baron and colonel of the Sokovian military and a former weapon of HYDRA watching movies together... do you think many would have ever thought such a thing would happen?

[He may have taken offense at the very notion many years ago.]

[ Bucky chuckles, reaching for his phone so he can pull up the delivery information. ]

Look, I've met a talking raccoon. This? Totally normal.

Toppings?

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